Man, yesterday SUCKED. I don't know why, but yesterday in particular, I was feeling extremely unsatisfied with my life and everything in it. Which doesn't consist of much... hence the depression.
Work lately is pure garbage. I have to try and not let that self-righteous twit of a woman in my office get me down. It's hard though. There's a wall between her and I, literally, and half of my department is over there with her, and half is here. I'm positive they talk about me over there. I bitch about her to two people in the office only- after hours or in the kitchenette. *sigh* The bitching doesn't really help anyways. She just sucks.
And now I'm so NOT looking forward to the Cookie Swap we do every year for the holidays, simply because she's going to be involved. I think that I just won't organize it. If they want it to happen, they'll have to set it up. I'm done with extra curricular activities at work. I'm done with extra effort, period. I'm not helping anyone out. I'm going to do my job, and that's it. It's going to drive me crazy, but craziness due to banality is better than craziness due to rage. I hope, anyways.
I'm also extremely lonely. I don't see a light at the end of this loneliness tunnel, either. I've given up hope of finding anyone to share my life with. A question was put forth last week at book club: "Do ugly people know they're ugly?" "Yes," I said, "they do." I look at myself in the mirror on more occasions than I'd like to admit and look away very disappointed. I know that if I want to change the way I look, I've got to try. But it's hard when there's no external motivation. It's all one big Catch 22. My whole life is one big Catch 22.
On a more positive note, Prison Break and Heroes were amazing last night. When Prison Break wrapped up, Bex and I cheered OUT LOUD. Like it was the Super Bowl or something. On second thought- the fact that television was the only thing that could make me smile yesterday is also kind of depressing.
This has been an extremely depressing post, and I apologize if I made anyone uncomfortable.
I think it's hilarious I made this setup today. I had no plans to do this... I just woke up this morning thinking about one of Carrie Musgrave's TtVF photos (Through the ViewFinder), wondering how she did it. I experimented a bit, then found this tutorial. I rigged up what you see here... and it sort of worked. I need a longer, better macro lens, and I found it really hard to focus. I couldn't tell if my AF was focusing on the ground glass, or the actual subject. Anyways... click the following link to see the results!
We had our monthly book club meeting last night, and we went to Tequila Bookworm. What a great place for a book club! We sat at the back, in the comfy cozy couches, and had a really good-looking waiter serving us. Always a bonus!
The discussion of the book was really in-depth; a roller coaster ride of opinions. The Time Traveler's Wife makes you think hard. While you're reading it, and once your finished. The book is about a man named Henry who has a genetic disease, which causes him to uncontrollably blip out of time and space, traveling back or forward in his life. But like I said last night, I wouldn't say this book is about a guy who time travels. It's a love story, about the struggles Henry and his wife Clare go through, caused by Henry's tendency to disappear every now and again, as well as the tough times any married couple would experience.
The big question of the evening was whether or not this book should be classified as Science Fiction. Technically, the book is about something that is not humanly possible (as far as we know). But because the book is written with such a realistic tone, I don't think it counts as Sci-Fi. It certainly doesn't look like a Sci-Fi book! Nestor said he really didn't like the cover, so we hopped online (thanks to the free wireless at Tequila Bookworm- god I love my new laptop), to see some of the other covers out there for this book. Here's what we found:
But the best image we found was this one by Jess the Fink on MySpace. I'm guessing she read the book, got inspired, and then drew this really cool illustration... Awesome, eh?
Another good question the book addresses is the age-old argument... Are our lives pre-destined, and therefore we have no control over the paths we take? Or do we have a certain amount of free will, and are able to change the route of our lives through the decisions we make? In the book, Henry is unable to change the outcome of anyone's life, even though he can travel back to integral moments over and over again (eg: he watches his mother die in a car crash numerous times). I think we concluded that it depends on your own faith/belief/spirituality. (Isn't that just always the answer- "it depends"?)
All in all, we rated this book 5 out of 5. I personally think it's the best book we've read in book club... even better than Three Day Road (which I picked last spring)!
Your natural talent is interpersonal relations and dealing with people. You communicate well and are able to bring disparate groups together. Your calming presence helps everything go more smoothly. People crave your praise and complements.
At home, I use Mozilla Firefox for my web browser. They've recently released the second version, and it's full of awesome features I can use, like spell check, integrated FTP transfers, etc. Along with the classic Firefox functions, like tabbed browsing, these upgrades make Firefox an easy and quick browser for the avid internet surfer.
I just started using Firefox at work too, since I like to spell check my listings, and I can have more than one website open and not have it look like I'm spreading my attention thin to anyone looking over my shoulder (indicated by the number of open windows seen in the Windows task bar).
However, Microsoft has now released Internet Explorer 7, which is a completely redesigned web browser from the Explorers we've known in the past. It's got the tabbed browser feature, plus it's got this really soft, overall look to it (rounded corners, nice graphic font on webpages, etc... almost "Mac-like"). It doesn't have an integrated spell check, but the Google toolbar I have installed will check any web forms I've got open with a click of a button. I'm not sure about the FTP function, but I imagine there's an add on somewhere for one.
So now I don't know which browser to stick with. My heart says Firefox, simply because it's the underdog (for now, anyways), and is the antithesis of a "big box" browser (to me, Microsoft is like the Walmart of the internet). But the look of the new Explorer 7 is really nice! I'm torn... does anyone have any opinions??
I'm listening to a CD in a BOOMBOX. I haven't done that... in... years!
It's a great CD, though- Smashing Pumpkins- Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness. It's a beautiful album... total old school. Reminds me of Sheila, and Paula. Jesus. So long ago. Paula and I had a falling out in grade 11, but I am glad for the fun times we had.
I distinctly remember blaring Siamese Dream on the living room stereo, and playing air bass, pretending to be D'arcy, thinking I was the hottest shit to ever be dropped on this earth. LOL
The computer arrived at work today! I couldn't believe it came so early! (It just took me like, 45 seconds to write that sentence; it's gonna take a while to get used to this keyboard.)
Now I just have to get this wireless network thingy up and running. It's more confusing than I thought it would be, and the fact that the new wireless modem didn't come with any instructions doesn't help. I spent way too much time on the phone with Bell tech support, and that was just to get the internet connection working on my laptop. Meh. James will come to the rescue tomorrow.
Back to my sweet new laptop... it's pretty nice. The screen is nice and big, it's super quick, it keeps your lap nice and warm, and it's new! YAY for new things!
Phew. The last couple days of work have certainly been trying. You see, there's this woman I work with, and we just rub each other the wrong way. I think it started when she got promoted? appointed? at the office, and I just didn't think she deserved it... errr... it just didn't make sense to me.
Anyways- yesterday she got all defensive when I double checked an order she had processed. She was all, "I told you I did it, it's done," and I was all, "I just like to be thorough," and she was all, "You do, eh." Then I said, "Excuse me?" and there was a moment where I thought words were going to be exchanged. But I walked away. I did ask her why she was being so defensive about it, but I don't remember her answer... I didn't really care why she was acting the way she was, I just wanted it to stop. Oh yeah- the whole order checking thing I was doing- was actually me helping her out.
But today went smoothly... we were civil to each other- which is as good as it's going to get, I'm sure. Must remain professional. Damn office.
Speaking of The Office... my new TV crush is John Krasinski... Jim on The Office. He's hilarious. And he's cuuuuuute.
I just ordered a new computer. This notebook to be precise:
I got a loan through work, and ordered it from dell.ca. I can't wait to get it! It's gonna be awesome... I read a bunch of reviews online, and the only real complaint was that it was a bit heavy. I don't think that's going to matter too much to me...
I'll get it within 15 days. So long to wait! D'oh!
Bex started her new job today, and it just happens to be right around the corner from Henry's. Sweet! I have a new lunch buddy!
We needed something quick (she wasn't sure how long of a lunch she had), so I suggested Mystic Muffin. We head over, but it wasn't until we got there that I remembered they don't have a debit machine.
Elias, the owner, said, "You've been here before," (which I had, but not for a while... how does he even remember?) "I know, I just forgot that you don't take debit. We'll go to the gas station and grab some cash. We'll be back- don't worry!" "No no... I'll lend you $20!" "No no! Don't be silly," I say. "Here, I'll loan you $20, and you can pay me back $1.50 interest. That's a dollar less you'll have to pay, compared to using the machine," Elias reasoned.
I just didn't feel right about this deal, I don't know why. I felt like maybe I wasn't going to be going back there for a while. But now that I think of it, I totally will be, since Bex is working so close. Also, that little loan would've forced me to go back- when I would also probably buy some more lunch. Totally good business sense on Elias' part... as James always says, "You gotta spend money to make money."
We went and got some cash, and I treated Bex to Good Luck on your First Day lunch. Yummy chicken salad on a pita and some of Elias' fresh, famous Apple Bread... which he's selling for super cheap right now- $5 for like, half a slab! I totally bought a slab and shared with the folks at work. And oh! There's two pieces left! A perfect snack for during Prison Break. Yesssssss.
Went and hung out with the TPMG on Church Street last night, to photograph all the hardcore celebrators of Hallowe'en. It was insane! I couldn't believe how elaborate some of the costumes were. Here's a few of the best ones, I thought (well... at least from what I saw- there were a tonne of people on the street):
There were three people dressed up like this... it was spectacular...
This guy was good...
This costume actually scared me. I don't know why- but I couldn't look at it for long...
And of course, everyone loved Amy and James as the PMPBOT 3000 and the Alien Hoe!
There's a new show on the CW based on this young adult sci-fi - I enjoy the show and couldn't pass up the opportunity to learn more about the characters.
